thefairymelusine: line drawing of a knight lying by a bank of flowers (Default)
posted by [personal profile] thefairymelusine at 12:43pm on 19/03/2016 under , , ,
I have come down with my third debilitating cough/temperature/cold symptoms in SIX WEEKS? This is very silly. The good news is: it isn't bronchitis (given the type of cough my parents and disability mentor thought it might be bronchitis). Went to the GP yesterday and was told it might turn into bronchitis, but to wait and see. (The effects of 6 and a bit years of binding mean I am more likely to get chest infections)

It's still bad enough that I can't really bind, which is very annoying, and I'm still in a moderate depressive episode which is worsened by being ill. Have been worse at remembering taking my painkillers, too, and then hitting exhausted combinations of pain + depression + pain induced fatigue.

In good news: returned my forms to Charing Cross (recorded delivery) yesterday, so might actually get an appointment at some point in the next year, despite having to take many extensions my course is going okay, I have nice friends who have been nice and encouraging when I've been ill and low this week
thefairymelusine: line drawing of a knight lying by a bank of flowers (Default)
posted by [personal profile] thefairymelusine at 01:38am on 08/09/2014 under , ,
 Having first made sure I have the details of people the few people I 1) did not have on other platforms and 2) wanted to stay in touch, or had at least given them mine. Feel slightly apprehensive, but mostly good- it had become a source of social anxiety, weird status envy, and learning that I disagreed with people I otherwise really liked, and would not have known this without their Facebook. (Not even terrible things- just people feeling very strongly about What Is Correct Characterisation In LARP in a way I disagree, or feel very strongly about things express this especially aggressively). 

So- I am now going to try and remember that I have had a social life *fine* without Facebook in the past, that I do actually manage most of my social life without it, and that I like having a social life where my main thoughts on encountering a person are "Oh, it is Person! It is nice/interesting/suprising to see them here" and not "Oh, it is Person, I must not tell them HOW WRONG they were on the internet last week"


(This is less of a problem for other platforms- Facebook just hits a lot of things for me. Especially as it often suggests friends in an unhelpful, although predictable, algorithmic manner: despite having *many* Facebook friends in common with her, I would rather not add the girl who outdone me to our year when I was 15 as a friend. Likewise, I have between 40-60 friends in common with my ex husband, and although I wish him well and am glad he seems to be doing well, I did unfriend him for a reason. (Mostly: not wanting to know about the minutiae of his life, weird irrational conviction that he was doing life better than me) 
cAlso, had a pre university/leaving drinks thing yesterday, and enough people turned up to justify it (C and H, who are my London-going-to-the-pub-and-sometimes-also-church friends, E- a queer geek friend, A who was at the first lesson of swing dance to which I went and with whom I'd been meant to have coffee for ages and my baby sister). Many other people couldn't make it, but sent nice texts/made other plans. I felt happier for it, and got to prove to my sister that yes, my friends do actually exist. (She also liked them and got on with them, which helped). 

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