thefairymelusine: line drawing of a knight lying by a bank of flowers (Default)
posted by [personal profile] thefairymelusine at 05:40pm on 09/05/2014 under , , , ,
1. It turns out that if you have major Mental Health Issues and specific learning difficulties, seeing student support and getting Additional Learning Support sessions is  a good idea, as the issues with your grades mightn't solely be that you are a terrible person and no good at anything and just faking being clever, but rooted in the dyspraxia and Mental health problems. (Have been having ALS for about six weeks now, grades have improved)

2. One of my texts for contains a Massive Trigger, BUT I have a tutor whose response to being told this (and me asking if I could excuse myself from classes during Triggery bits) was "Don't put yourself through that and risk making yourself more stressed about being vulnerable in front of people, just skip the classes where we're doing readthroughs, I know you've read the play" which is really good. (It also helps that I have a classmate who on seeing me massively triggered took me for coffee and told me that yes, I should raise this issue with the tutor, putting myself in that situation and trying to pretend it was fine was stupid. (The text is "The History Boys" by Alan Bennett, btw)

3. I went dancing on Saturday, this is a good thing in itself

4. I went dancing on Saturday, ran into my ex (who was there with current partners) and did not run away or die or have a massive panic attack, but instead had a small panic attack, did Things to Cope (had a smoke, texted Friend I Talk To Most Days to panic at him, went back in and focused on dancing) and managed to make small talk at the bar later in the evening with my ex, during which I also Did Not Die.

5. I got a Distinction on both my most recent modules in Literature, which is good.

6. I've accepted university offers and applied for Student Finance.

7. I have a date/datelike thing with a cute boy tomorrow. 

thefairymelusine: line drawing of a knight lying by a bank of flowers (Default)
posted by [personal profile] thefairymelusine at 03:46am on 12/03/2014 under , ,
 An annoying side effect of having to resubmit two pieces of work in the last fortnight is I am now 1) completely paranoid about having to do so again 2) obsessively worrying about needing to do so on the current assignment, to the extent that I have spent far too much time and energy on it. 

(On the plus side I passed the first resubmit)
thefairymelusine: line drawing of a knight lying by a bank of flowers (Default)
posted by [personal profile] thefairymelusine at 06:01pm on 04/10/2007 under , ,
For some reason Modern american literature puts me in a good mood. Possibly because I like the teacher, possibly because it's one on one and therefore my thoughts are considered to be of merit, worthwhile and NOT those of a six year old, possibly because I just enjoy getting angry at fictional, spoilt, american ex pats. (They are SO irritating. Seriously, when you identify more with the characters in Brideshead than you do in with another novel there's something wrong. Although I have a *slight* thing about Brideshead, as you may have noticed). 
But regarding other things at college, they're going a bit better. I might get more one on one lessons, which means fewer hours but going at a speed which is not ridiculously slow, so that's good. And if I can stop the social paranoia I might succeed in talking to people out of lessons, which would be a good thing. That seems unlikely at the moment but if I can manage to enjoy the lessons then a lot of pain goes out of my year. And I feel like myself.

I'm listening to Kirsty Maccoll's Innocence on repeat, because it helps with the happiness, and want to recommend it to everyone, just for the fantastic bitchiness of it. She's so horrible she's almost Ciceronian, apart from the fact that she's direct.
Music:: Kirsty Maccoll- Innocence (Guilt mix)
Mood:: awake
location: bedroom


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