thefairymelusine: line drawing of a knight lying by a bank of flowers (Default)

I managed to lock my asking for advice on poetry set lists for various reasons, including insufficient proof reading. I now cannot change the date stamp on it, so if you want to read my recent poetry and tell me which stuff an audience might less hate hearing, here it is:
thefairymelusine: line drawing of a knight lying by a bank of flowers (Default)

And further to the theme of Coming Out Day, a loud slam poem about self defining and roles.

“Is it just assuming a role?” she asks

Why yes, but for heaven’s sake

Not just gender but all identity’s performative

And I’m sick of being forced

Into being faux (or assumed) heternormative

Normative at all in fact, I don’t want

Unbroken skin, brown hair, or not

To have my mother in a whirl

Because you say it’s a role,

But all of me is, is many

And always will be, my own silent soliloquy,

For when there are no words,

When a fuck you, or an identity, gives me

Hope, or purpose or just something to be

Something to feel I am, for others

So that I can be there, to be loved

Or hated, or ignored, but without that

All the lies and rumours and hostility

Is true, and not in the way that I want

So this, all this, the style, the actions, the loves

Are all just me, roles, but what I want

And should, and need to be, complete

Imperfect, changing, and essential

thefairymelusine: line drawing of a knight lying by a bank of flowers (Default)
posted by [personal profile] thefairymelusine at 05:33pm on 25/05/2009 under , , , ,
Good things:
I cut my hair. I didn't do it myself, but went to an hairdresser, and I now have shorter hair, in a vaguely Enid from Ghost world bob but with a fringe. The fringe is currently blonde. Soon I will be paid and then it may be hairdye time. Or I may retrieve the hairdye from James and then it shall be blue and blue black. And then blue and some other colour. (I am thinking bright blue and bright pink, possibly with some blue black, and I may add purple if I have any left.)
I have a boyfriend with blue hair. This is exciting. (also, you know, he's pretty wonderful in respects other than hair.)
I wrote a poem and had the guts to read it out in front of people, and that was not the terrifying hell I was expecting.
The weekend was awesome. Poetry and drinking until the early morning is win.
Madmen is also awesome, and if anyone can make me a Madmen icon I would be pleased (preferably Betty.)

Things about which I am not sure:
you know how you miss when I was completely melting and regularly blogged about my constant changes in medication and the side effects. Another anti depressant has been added to my meds, citalopram, and there's a possibility of a mood stabiliser as well, once my mood is, well, stable. I'm having a slight meds freakout, which I'll write about later.  (The whole it seems to take a lot of stuff, including stuff other than meds, to make this go away and that scares me and sometimes I have depression freakouts along the lines of maybe I'm fine really and just need to pull myself togehter, but that is majorly stupid, because I am doing as much as I am able.)

Going to go and write Maelstrom characters now.
thefairymelusine: line drawing of a knight lying by a bank of flowers (Default)
posted by [personal profile] thefairymelusine at 07:41pm on 27/11/2008 under
Have a poem. From the man whose career I am emulating at the moment, with less war and rhyme. (And by the way I knew it before it was in Byatt).

She tells her love while half asleep,
In the dark hours,
With half-words whispered low:
As Earth stirs in her winter sleep
And put out grass and flowers
Despite the snow,
Despite the falling snow

Seriously will put the credit for this up later, but for the mean time do people want to guess?


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